Whether you know it or not, one of my jobs as your lawyer is to be your filter. Clients don’t realize just how poorly they can come across. They are caught up in the emotional aspect of their divorce. They are hurt. They want revenge. They want to get back at their spouse. They want their spouse to hurt just as much they hurt (more, really).

As a result, clients will say anything. They will tell me what they want me to argue in Court. “If only the Judge knows this about my spouse,” they think, and I would win! But, my job is not to be your mouthpiece. I have to listen to you, and then decide what is helpful to your cause and what is not. I can’t just simply repeat everything you tell me to the Court.

A good example is marital infidelity. Because Minnesota is a no-fault divorce state, if your spouse cheats on you, this will almost never have any relevance in Court. Clients have a hard time accepting that. Sorry, but that’s just the way it is. I will get nowhere if I mention that to the Court. In fact, the Court would probably think less of me (you) for making such a point, because it would look like I am trying to “score points” in the case in a way that the law does not allow.

I get it that sometimes people just need to vent. We just can’t vent to the Court. I’ve seen plenty of cases where unrepresented parties say things to the Court that would get filtered out by a skilled attorney. So, don’t be offended if I tell you that we can’t make a certain argument to the Court. You pay me for my advice. I’d be doing you a disservice if I just repeated everything you wanted me to say without regard for whether or not it is a legally wise thing to say or not.

You’re allowed to be upset. You’re allowed to vent. Just make sure that you do that in the proper forum, and not in the Courtroom where it could kill your case. Let me decide what we say and what we don’t say.


Meet Marc Beyer

Marc Beyer practices in all areas of family law, including divorce, child custody, parenting time, child support, spousal maintenance, and property division. Marc’s philosophy is to negotiate the best settlement possible, but he is prepared to go to trial when necessary. Recognizing that every situation is unique, Marc takes pride in listening to his client’s concerns, and creates goals, expectations, and case strategy for the client accordingly.


Contact Beyer & Simonson

If you are facing divorce and any of the divorce-related issues such as spousal maintenance, child support, child custody, property division, or domestic abuse matters, you need our experienced Minneapolis divorce attorneys to help you. Contact Beyer & Simonson in Edina, Minnesota today at (952) 303-6007.

Latest Posts related to Divorce